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The only thing worse than a male chauvinistic pig is a woman that won’t do as she is told
The old saying "I wouldn`t wish this on my worst enemy"... Clearly you have forgotten why they are your worst enemy.
Women have closets full of `I have nothing to wear.`
Have you ever make fun of someone so much, you think you should thank them for all the good times you´ve had?
Apparently, I`m the only one that wants to drink beer at this intervention.
She was rare, like an onion ring in french fries
I don`t like it here anymore. As soon as I find my pants, I`m leaving!
You see a mouse trap, I see free cheese and a challenge. ;)
I’m not surprised you’re having problems I had a bad experience with your reality once too.
That awkward moment when you gently throw your phone onto your bed and it decides to bounce off 3 walls, Knock over a lamp, and kill a cat.
Anyone knows when is Facebook sending us the W-2 forms
I bet kangaroos get drunk and find some ridiculous shit in their pouches in the morning.
Finding out your ex got fat is like finding 20 bucks in your pocket. Not life changing but definitely puts a smile on your face.
I got my panties all in a bunch ... You know those Wal Mart 10 pack cotton bundles.
The cashier at this self checkout is horrible.