Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Do you know what would really be fun? ... No really.. If you know, tell me.. I`m bored to death.
Me: Mom…Dad. I’ve decided to live on my own from now on. Parents: Ok, cool. Me: Your luggage is outside.
People all around the world are out doing interesting and productive things right now. You are reading this.
What if the weather talks about us?
Women say they love nerds until you whip out your Pokemon cards.
If anyone has any terrible ideas, I`ve historically been very open to them.
Statistically, 6 out of 7 dwarfs aren`t happy.
An ex asking to stay friends after you break up is like a kidnapper asking to stay in touch after they let you go.
I am the head of this household, and I have my wife`s permission to say so.
I hate getting paid and being broke all in the same day!! :(
I wish I had money so I could be eccentric instead of just weird.
The worst form of Alzheimer’s is when you walk out of the kitchen and forget to grab a beer.
Opposites attract, that`s the trouble with being awesome
I’m dedicating this status update to all the status-less people out there. Stay strong.
Please don`t come to my garage sale if you`ve ever let me borrow something.