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I would like to think that I`ll die heroic death saving someone`s life but it`s more likely I`ll trip over my shoelaces and choke on a spoonful of Nutella.
One man`s sarcastic answer, is another man`s stupid question
I am tired of men complaining about women complaining about men complaining about women
Man, those 2013 Mayan Calenders are REALLY hard to find...
I`m not sure it`s possible to fill a moving truck these days without the word "Tetris" being brought into the conversation.
* feels winds of change * realizes it`s just a hole in my shorts
My favorite part of the movie The Notebook is where I turned it off and watched Terminator 2 instead.
Is everything expensive or am I just poor?
Instead of cleaning the house I just watch an episode of Hoarders and I think WOW, my house really looks great.
My boyfriend asked me why I bother watching cooking shows when I cant cook so I asked why he bothered watching porn.
Nobody tell my husband that "year round periods" aren`t a thing.
It`s not too late to start convincing our children that the world really did end in 2012 and we`re the survivors.
I`d be much more attracted to you if you were much more attractive.
Of course women have cleaner minds than men. They change them much more often
Alcohol – The best night time: slurring, headache, dehydration, drink spilling, charm killing, so you think you can dance “medicine.”