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I feel bad for lions at zoos. How would you feel if a bunch of pizzas came to your house, took your picture, and you couldn`t even eat them.
Never assume coz u wil make an "ass" out of "u" and "me"
I miss the life I planned in my head.
I bought some shoes of a drug dealer, I don`t know what he laced them with but I`ve been tripping all day.
All I see on Facebook is penis, orgasm, bang him, bang her, bullwhip, masturbate, porn, tits, and then I read everyone else`s posts..
Superman and Batman probably had a lot of "capes in the toilet water" accidents when they went to take a dump.
How do amish girls know if its a romantic candle lit dinner or just a regular candle lit dinner.
A walk of shame is always sad. Don`t make it worse by adding the sound of Flip flops to it.
Life is not fair. But life is not fair for everyone, which actually makes it fair.
If I could get a firm grip on reality...I`d probably choke it.
If you think about it,, Batman was pretty lazy about naming all his stuff.
Facebook: The only place where you get excited when strangers follow you.
Screw doing situps...teddy bears don`t and everyone loves them.
Do me a favor if someone tells you they don`t like me , tell them I don`t like them either.
Just stopped by my old high school and updated my phone number on all the bathroom stalls.