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Shopping tip: You can get shoes for a buck at bowling alleys.
"You know, I wish I`d never gone to the pool that day." ~Marco Polo
You women may be surprised to learn that making us sleep on the couch isn`t that bad. It`s kinda manly, makes us feel like we are camping......with a really angry bear nearby.
Politicians and diapers should be changed regularly and for the same reason...
I was halfway to the state line before I realized the sirens were part of the song that was playing
A psychologist is selling a video that teaches you how to test your dog’s IQ. Here’s how it works: If you spend $12.99 for the video, your dog is smarter than you.
Is it considered rude to ask your boss if it hurt when the house fell on her in The Wizard of Oz?
I laughed more at the Broncos offense then I did at the commercials.
My baby girl is so polite. I told her she needed to share and she said "No, thank you"
My plan for today? Same as always: Drink coffee and be sexy.
There is no time like the present for postponing what you ought to be doing.
The two major causes of depression are: a) having a job, and b) not having a job.
I listen to all of of the voices in my head...except the one named Reason. He makes NO sense to me.
When Miley is naked & licks a hammer it’s “art” & “music” ... but when I do it, I`m “wasted” & “have to leave Home Depot"
Cocaine dealers are always trying to stick their business in other people`s noses.