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Son to mom: why should I sweep the floor? Mom to son: do you want to be an Olympic Curl champion?
I prefer to use the bathroom naked w/ the door wide open. Sorry if this interferes with your idea of a "safe & fun work environment"
I can`t get the cork off my dinner.
Insomnia causes questionable browser history.
Somebody tell me how "Rub a dub dub, 3 men in a tub" became a nursery rhyme?
If you want to set up a company and run it then that`s your business.
Christmas is just like a day at the office ... You do all the work and the fat guy with the suit gets all the credit.
likes beer. On occasion, I will even drink beer to celebrate major events such as the my birthday or the fact that that it`s Monday.
Shake up a random soda pop in the company fridge today. You deserve it.
How many decades of knowing someone before it`s rude to ask what their name is?
Never hire an Electrician with no eyebrows
Seriously, dude...Is there a name for what`s wrong with you?
I don`t understand why I cant lose weight. I thought dieting was a piece of cake.
That one day of fame on Facebook because it`s your birthday.
Nobody looks back at their life and remembers the nights they got plenty of sleep.