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Things are finally looking up for me. This Victoria`s Secret catalog just told me this is going to be "your sexiest year ever."
What do people mean when they say the computer went down on them?
"It seemed like a good idea at the time"............................... An often used phrase in a lot of my memories.
I want a doorbell that makes the sound of someone knocking on the door.
Roses are red, violets are blue, If i had a brick id throw it at you.
That moment you realize that the person who proofread Hitler`s speeches was indeed a Grammar Nazi.
Do you think retailers in Colorado have seen an increase in the sales of Easy Bake ovens and Brownie mix?
The best sign of a healthy relationship is no sign of it on Facebook.
Just found out I`m pregnant. At least that`s what this expectant mother sign for my parking spot says.
My new year`s resolution is to stop making new year`s resolutions.
Good things come to those who wait ... Which explains why I`m always late.
My therapist says I am too preoccupied by vengeance.... We`ll see about that.
Life Tip: Get a birthday card with anything you are embarrassed to buy.
You know if you say gullible slowly it sounds like oranges :)
When someone rings the doorbell, why do dogs always assume it’s for them?