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I`ve actually have come to the conclusion that some of today`s youth may actually believe "laughing out loud" is actually spelled "lol"
One of the greatest things about owning a dog is how happy they are to see you even though you just stepped out of the house for 30 seconds.
My brain is giving me the silent treatment
I don`t remember anything that happened, but I may have had a drink or two...
My bank is the worst. They`re charging me money for not having enough money in my account. Apparently, I can`t even afford to be broke.
You have to hand it to Subway for convincing us it`s acceptable to eat an entire loaf of bread for lunch.
Not sure if I need sex, sleep, or to punch someone in the face.
She said she was stripping to feed her kids but then got pissed when I started throwing canned goods at her
Singing in the shower is illegal according to this Ikea security guard.
I wasn`t born with enough middle fingers to show you how I really feel about you!
If you can`t read the bottom of the eye chart, spell something dirty. Eye doctors love that sh!t.
Stop procrastinating. Join Hokey Pokey Anonymous today and turn that life around!
Of course women have cleaner minds than men. They change them much more often
Common Sense is so rare, it should be classified as a super power.
Is your drama going to have an intermission soon? I need to pee.