Mobile App Coming Soon - Daily Silly Status

Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!

Love is grand. Divorce is 100 grand.
HardCoreStrategy 22 hours ago 6 3? Guys are? in a cafe. The first guy says "I?? have the smallest arm in the? world." The second guy says I have the?? smallest head in? the world." The third guy says I have the smallest d^ck in the world. They all? go to? the Guinness Book of World records. The? first? guy comes back and says I really? have the smallest arm in the world. The seconds guy? returns and? says? I have the smallest head in the world. The third guy comes back? and angrily?? says WHO? T
keeps getting dirty voicemails from unknown numbers. If it`s you.. Send more
A lot of people do not realize that the actor who played Wilson in Castaway is the same actor from the volleyball scene in Top Gun.
A reality show where a couple wins $10 million dollars if they show nobody a picture of their baby for the first 2 years.
I`m trying to locate a girl from high school. You know, the one who could tie a cherry stem with her tongue.
Dear sneeze, If you`re gonna happen, happen. Don`t put a stupid look on my face and leave
That feeling you get when you meet someone named dick....
I am finally old enough to realize my father was right, but now my kids think I am wrong.
It’s getting harder and harder to find vodka-flavored vodka.
Burned almost a thousand calories with the elliptical machine today. Moved it into the basement, that thing is heavy!
If at first you don`t succeed, find out where she lives.
Testing shows that people in the USA know less about geography than England, Japan and like 100 other countries I`ve never heard of.
The girl next door looks over at me, then her phone, then makes a disgusted look on her face. I think she`s just found my Facebook account
A homeless man just asked me if I was having a bad hair day, so I took my dollar back.