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The only difference between fear and adventure is how much you breathe.
The only thing I hate about beer is that there`s absolutely nothing I hate about beer... :)
Good girls are bad girls that never get caught.
I was sitting in traffic the other day. That’s probably why I got run over.
Facebook is serious. I put more thought into whether or not to accept a friend request than whether or not to sleep with someone.
My favorite sexual position is pretty much any of them. I`m just glad to be involved.
My dog reminds me of my ex. She doesn`t pull her weight financially and she`s scared of the vacuum.
On Mondays I like to reply to all my bosses emails with `unsubscribe`
There is a piece of aluminum foil blowing across the road and all I can think is that one of you is without your protective headgear today.
I dig, she digs, he digs, they dig, we dig. its not a good poem but its really deep.
I call it a Cupcake Salad. And I don`t see how it`s any of your business.
I just devoured a six inch from Subway and I`m still not satisfied. I get it ladies. I get it.
Women with big breasts... ...can get a taxi on the worst days ...have a neat place to carry spare change ...have always been the center of the arts (art) ...make jogging a spectator sport ...can keep a magazine dry while laying in the tub ...have more negotiating power (with men shorter than them) ...usually can find leftover popcorn after a movie ...can always carry a little extra ...always float better ...know where to look first for lost earrings ...rarely lack for a slow dance partner ...hav
My idea of drinking responsibly is using a coaster.