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Good thing girls started uploading pictures next to a pool with the caption "Summer is finally here!" or we wouldn`t have known it`s summer.
Modern video games are giving kids unrealistic standards of how many swords they can carry at one time.
Long story short, I love summaries.
If you live by the sword, I guess that is pretty cool. I live by some trees and shit.
Because of tanning beds, 1000 years from now archaeologists will think we used to fry people as punishment.
Who let the owls out?? Don`t sing the chorus you`ll make it worse.
I have lots of great personality traits. Or as my doctor calls them, symptoms.
You`re about 8 beers away from being my type.
You know what would make my cubicle super cute? Fire.
People who get out of the car and actually have a sit down meal inside McDonald`s scare me.
I was being taught to use some machinery today, and I was quizzed as to the rules of it`s use. When asked what the first rule is I responded, "You do not talk about Fight Club."
If someone tells you `I love you` but you don`t feel the same way and don`t wanna make it awkward just say `I love YouTube` really really fast :)
I just put Santa hats on all my Halloween decorations.
If you heard twenty minutes of moaning from my bedroom that was just me trying to stand up.
If two wrongs don`t make a right, try three.