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My fantasy is having two women at once...One Cooking, One Cleaning.
I may or may not have just tried unlocking the wrong car for 15 minutes.
My neighbor just spent $237.43 at the vet, that`s $1,662.01 in dog dollars.
I`m pretty sure the whole "ladies first" thing was created by a guy just to check out girls butts.
If life gives you lemons make grape juice than lay back and watch people wondering how you did it;)
How are poor people so good at finding money for tattoos?
Bars are Weird Its the only Business that kicks you out for buying TOO much of their Product
I can`t tell if I actually have free time, or if I`m just forgetting everything...
Life`s most terrifying 10 seconds: Being held hostage in the corner of the shower by cold water.
What do bats eat that makes their sh!t our standard for crazy?
I always try to learn from the mistakes of other people..... who have taken my advice
I wouldn`t say I "missed" your call.
Why is it called Boob Sweat and not Humiditties?
Feeling a little sassy today...But then again, that`s everyday
I don`t use cocaine, I just like the way it smells.