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Ever since I heard that women have one breast bigger than the other, it`s given me another reason to stare.
Whoยดs up for Candyland? $20 buy in
Sometimes I wonder if that kid in the Dreamworks logo has caught the fish yet.
Started a new exercise routine yesterday. So far I`ve only missed one day.
I think about hiring a maid way too often for someone who has plenty of time to clean.
Ever since I heard that women have one breast bigger than the other,it`s given me another reason to stare.
My mother is the strongest woman I know. You should see how far she could throw a shoe.
I didn`t see anyone important today so I`m going to wear the same clothes tomorrow.
The problem with this generation boils down to this one thing: Their cartoons suck.
No thanks, marriage. If I wanted to stop getting laid I would just start wearing crocs.
Okay kids don`t ever talk to strangers or take candy from strangers or go to stranger`s houses except on the day we worship the devil.
I asked him about his weekend, but apparently what happens in vagueness, stays in vagueness.
I started to keep a notepad beside the bed so that I can write down post at night, so far I have: Really shitty handwriting in the dark.
I had a bit of a lazy day sitting in my underwear looking for jobs online. My boss was furious.
I have a tattoo of a gigantic bruise on my left ankle in case anyone ever asks me to go hiking. Or help them move.