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You know you are old when your parties have glasses instead of red plastic cups.
Apparently there`s enough room in my mouth to put more than one foot.
If you replace the "W" in "where" "what" and "when" with "T" you get answers to the questions.
When my dog sniffs another dog`s poop I can only assume that it`s their equivalent to checking a friend`s facebook page.
Game of Thrones characters should have to wear jerseys with their names on the back
Women say they love nerds until you whip out your Pokemon cards.
We`re all mature until somebody brings out the bubble-wrap...
why waste your brain cells to think of a comment when you can just like someone else`s?
I love everybody. Some I love to be around, some I love to avoid, and others I love to punch in the face.
Bulimia: Twice the taste. Zero Calories.
You know it`s time to delete Facebook when your mom, dad, uncles, aunties, grandparents etc... is on it.
Do me a favor if someone tells you they don`t like me , tell them I don`t like them either.
Don`t judge a man by how low his pants hang below his a$$...just kidding, that`s a great reason to judge someone.
Trying to remain humble but Iām the most famous person in my living room right now.
Hell hath no fury like a girl tagged in an unapproved pic on Facebook.