Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
This complimentary lemonade at the doctor`s office tastes funny.
This rough sex would have been a lot better if I wasn`t alone.
Knife > gun because if I pull a knife, you don`t know what I`m gonna do. Stab you? Open a letter? Or am I gonna frost a cake? It`s a mystery
You should see the sh!t I don`t post.
Seems like we would be just fine with about half as many types of pasta
Alcohol increases the Send Button size by 89%.
Amazing how many people just stroll into tattoo parlors and say "Give me the dumbest thing you can think of."
Candy Crushers keep inboxing me saying that they need "lives" as if I didn`t already know that.
According to new research, too much sex can cause memory loss. Finally, something that explains my ultra detailed photographic memory.
Why are police men so strong? Because they hold up traffic.
Jobs are like relationships. You have them, you cry about it. You don’t have them, you cry about it.
You might call it lazy ... I call it selective participation.
No matter how fast you run, the serial killer always walks faster.
Don`t EVER break a pinky promise. That sh!t is LEGIT.
How many servings of fruit are in a fruit roll up? I`m trying to take my diet seriously now.