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Relationships are like batteries, they have a positive & a negative side. And you end up whacking your remote instead of changing them.
So how many women out there think men are pigs? Gimme a show of tits!
If you are naughty go to your room, if you wanna be naughty go to mine :)
Apparently beer contains female hormones. After you drink enough you can neither drive nor shut the hell up
sex is like a joke, some get it some don`t.....
How can I go to sleep when this movie I’ve seen 70 times just started?
I wish Monday was a figment of my imagination.
My motto is "Never say never." Which makes it difficult to tell people my motto...
I bought powdered water but I don`t know what to add to it.
Say what you want about the porn industry. But they are hard workers.
If there is such thing as a fake noodle, does that make it an impasta?
Congratulations on becoming a homeowner! From now on, every noise you hear will cost you money.
I`ve stopped drinking for good. I only drink for evil now.
If Wal-Mart ends up selling mortgages, the trailer market will explode.
I thought we had something. You met my family, made me dinner, called me honey. Now suddenly you’re a “waitress” who was “doing her job?”