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There`s no better reminder to visit your dentist than a trip to Walmart.
It`s just a mater of time before bathrooms will eventually be called Selfie Rooms
I hide my vodka in orange juice
"Okay" means you`re in the clear. "K" means you`re better off not coming home. Fellas, you know what I`m talking about.
You can stay, but your clothes must go.
You are the reason why I bite the heads off teddy grams.
Does the 5 second rule apply to soup? Please answer quickly!
I`m just chilling tonight with my new plane ... Oops, I`ve said too much.
Settle down homemade play dough parents.
If I could bring one dead person back to life I`d bring back Walk Disney. Just to show him the shows on Disney channel and see his reaction..
I hate it when the little voices argue with my imaginary friends.
Can anybody PLEASE tell me where you buy Common Sense?? I know several people that need some!!!
I saw a man at the beach screaming, "Help, shark, help!" I laughed because I knew the shark wasn`t going to help him.
I hate when I`m admiring my good looks from a car`s window reflection and the people inside think I`m staring at them.
Letting the cat out of the bag is a whole lot easier than putting it back in.