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I make one mistake and my pharmacist now adds "by mouth" on the prescription label.
Redneck Word : debate...i was gonna go fishin today but forgot to bring debate
When they say " drink responsibly ", what they really mean is "don`t f***in spill it!"
Yeah but why do they call him Bigfoot if both of his feet are the exact same size
My friend sent his wedding invitation from Facebook Event. I sent him a gift from Farmville.
You know those orange cones they put on the highway for you to knock down? I just beat my high score last night!
You can`t fight Destiny. Because if you try to fight Destiny, then you have to fight the bouncers and the rest of the strippers too...
You are on the list of the many things I would do for a Klondike bar.
The easiest way to find out if a movie is on Netflix is to simply ask yourself "do I want to see it?" If you do, it`s not on Netflix.
Give a man a gun and he can rob a bank, give a man a bank and he can rob the world.
Guys are at their mathematical best when a girl says she is pregnant. Agree or nah??
It`s been discovered that 1% of the population is allergic to Gluten. The other 99% are sick and tired of hearing about it......
Apparently this dude at the mall was just tying his shoe and did NOT want to play leap frog. My bad, dude. My bad.
Just saw the first duckface of Spring.
I bet if you asked a one-eyed person, they`d tell you it really WAS all fun and games up until that point.