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Whoever named the seesaw probably didn’t get another chance to name stuff.
Halloween Drinking Game: Drink every-time an Elsa (from Frozen) visits your house.
My fella asked me to name all my sexual partners. I took a couple of minutes to list them and eventually got to him. Should of stopped there
It only takes 2 ingredients to make a baby. Does that not blow your mind. Like at least there should be some flour or something.
whenever i`m bored I just expect at any moment for the Koolaid man to break through my wall and take me on a deliciously refreshing adventure!
Every shape I had to learn above octagon was just a total fu*king waste of time.
I like to walk around my house naked… Until my neighbors scream at me to go back inside
The key to a woman`s heart is making her laugh...just make sure she`s not laughing at the size of your junk.
If you can’t be a good example, then you’l just have to serve as a horrible warning
If you ever hit rock bottom, bring some beer. I`m almost out.
scratch here ¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦ to reveal my status
The only thing my girlfriend blows is everything out of proportion.
You ever think that maybe the reason geese are always honking is because they`re flying too close together?
I`m so fresh they call me "ferbreeze"
dreams of a better world... where chickens can cross the road without having their motives questioned