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Shhh...you had me at "alcohol may intensify effect..."
“Have you tried just drinking ALOT of vodka?”- me as a therapist
good boys go to heaven bad boys go every where
This would be a "Good Morning!" status update, but it`s not, because morning sucks.
If I had a nickel for every time someone called me OCD I`d have 27 dollars and 15 cents.
When you consider names for your baby, it`s important to try out the middle name in an angry voice.
My brain is about as well organized as the Walmart $5 dvd bin.
A leaf blower, but for people.
I`ve found that the things I`m most interested in aren`t really in my best interest.
I swear I saw a guy earlier today that had no chin and all I could think about was, how does he put on pillow cases?
if your looking for love sorry to disappoint you im already in a relationship with fun and freedom. :-)
I keep an identical glass of vodka next to the water on my bedside table for a refreshing morning game of Russian Roulette
I’m awkward when people compliment me. “Nice hair” “Thanks, I grew it myself”
Just looked at the price of baby strollers. I think were gonna have an indoor baby.
Kinda funny how the Mayans said we were all gonna die in 2012, but they all disappeared way before us.