Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Life was much simpler when we could play a friendly game of Red Rover and just clothesline the people we didn’t like.
Seems like my body should have better things to do than make nipple hair.
Sometimes I wanna comment on a photo on Facebook but then I don`t wanna have to explain why I`m in your `Random Party Pics 08` album at 4am.
This whole being a responsible adult thing sucks.
There could be a ghost aggressively breakdancing next to you right now, and you`d have no Idea...
I totally understand how batteries feel because I`m never included in things either
Dear IRS…I would like an itemized receipt showing me exactly how every one of my tax dollars is being spent. Thanks.
You know you`re poor when you sneak into Sam`s Club with some random family just to eat samples for lunch. Yay... Christmas
I just realised that sex is like air..its not important unless you are not getting any.
Why isn’t the default for online shopping “view all”? Who likes to skip through 20 pages of only 12 items…
My weight loss goal is to not care about the crumbs at the bottom of a Pringles can.
I just want to be rich enough to be referred to as eccentric instead of crazy.
I`m not interested in anything that requires 5 hours of energy.
SEX! Now that I got your attention. I just wanted to say, "Have a great weekend!"
I`ve spent three hours investigating this chicken and I still can`t find his nuggets.