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You never know a person until you walk in their shoes, or until you check their browser history.
I just took a 5 hour energy and a sleeping pill...LET THE BATTLE BEGIN.
It is totAlly unnecessary to put a PM after 23:00.
Let me check my giveashitmeter ... nope nothing.
I`m just standing here...50 yards away, waiting for the restraining order to expire.
FUN THING TO WRITE ON A POST CARD: βWeather is great, having tons of fun! Are you still planning to murder your mailman?β
When I said I wanted to take it slow, I meant your life.
Hey, how long are you supposed to chase someone after they steal your wallet? Cause I`m getting tired of running and he`s catching up to me.
"With a stroke of a pen your name can live on forever in a quote!... Unknown,
Why does no one ever talk about where a bear pees?
You can either be right, or you can be the husband.
According to the police, public masturbation is not considered a "street performance". Even if you have a hat on the ground on front of you.
October is breasts cancer month. I stare because I care.
thjeo oskl asopa joa sajksla wioj apska shul bhcgy ....Yes I just wasted your time ;)
Finding a needle in a haystack is quite easy if you just set the hay on fire.