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I purchased my own Taser off the internet the other day. In a totally unconnected incident, I´ve got to buy a cat to replace the neighbors one this afternoon.
" a fool and his money ----- are never around when you need a loan......"
My method of going "offline" in FB chat is to simply ignore you.
Remember they’re just as afraid of seeing you dance as you are of dancing.
Prostitution must be a hole sale business.
Apparently there`s enough room in my mouth to put more than one foot.
doesn`t mind that people start spreading rumors about me.. it’s when they spread the truth that I’m screwed ;)
Alcohol goes in ... Happiness comes out.
My doctor told me, "DON`T mix this medicine with alcohol or you could wake up somewhere naked with a monkey on your arm." CHALLENGE ACCEPTED
You the bomb" "No you the bomb" A compliment in America. An argument in the middle east
The dollar store needs to go ahead and open up a few gas stations.
That amazing moment when you post a comment on Facebook and everyone likes it.
I wouldn`t mind all the penis enlargement emails if they weren`t coming from my wife.
Excuse me sir, where do you keep the "Whoomp"? Oh, there it is.
Donald Duck, saying screw you to pants since 1934.