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They call cat people crazy but they`re not the ones outside at 5AM putting fresh dog poop into little baggies.
I love being married. It`s so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
My Memory.....The Second shortest thing I have.
Yawning is our body`s way of saying 20% of battery remaining
An arranged marriage is just another way of saying that your parents helped you get laid.
All I`m saying is why blame it on being lazy when you can blame it on being old?
All I`m saying is why blame it on being lazy when you can blame it on being old...
Iām not going bald. Iām getting more head.
Hey I just met you, and this is crazy. But add me on Facebook and I`ll stalk you (maybe)
Digging through a box in the closet and I found a picture of me sitting on Santa`s lap. Hard to believe that was almost 2 years ago.
Didn`t have to do much to end my last relationship...she first told me that "opposites attract"...then a couple of days later she told me i was handsome, kind, smart, funny and loving...
Never laugh at your wife`s choices. You are one of them :)
I`m good at counting cards. I keep ending up with 52.
Insanity workout? The fact I am even considering putting down my phone and getting off the couch is crazy enough, thanks.
I used to be addicted to the hokey pokey but i turned myself around and THAT`S what it`s all about