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LISTEN: It was sweet of you to suck the venom out of my snake bite, but if you really loved me... you would have swallowed.
Roses are red, violets are blue. I lowered my standards, just for you.
How to find the perfect husband: Play monopoly with him. if he chooses the iron, he`s the one
I worry about people who write "taken" in their bios. Where did they go? Who took them? Why aren`t we helping to find them?
When people tell me "you`re going to regret that in the morning" I sleep in until noon because I`m a problem solver
Tennis is like marrying for money. Love means nothing.
Fitbits are just like Tamagotchis, except the stupid little creature you have to keep alive is yourself.
I like to fill my medicine cabinet with marbles before I invite people over.
Don`t forget to turn your clocks back today if you want them to be set to the wrong time.
Ya .... That Supermoon was OK ..... But I was quite disappointed when I realized it didn`t even have a cape.
A guy knocked on my door asking for a small donation for the local pool, so I gave him a glass of water.
dont love..dont hurt...keep doing flirt..:)
I’m at the age where all my posts start with the phrase ā€œI’m at the age where.ā€
I`m smiling, that alone should scare you.
How many exercise/workout videos does a person have to buy before seeing results?