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Which wine goes best with more wine?
Couch pillows are really just fart silencers.
The naked truth is better, than d dressed-up lie :) Aa
You never really know a woman, until she takes you to court.
Why isn’t “cheating” a relationship status on Facebook?
Is it rude to throw a breath mint in someone`s mouth while they are talking?
so I got really drunk last night, but I was good and took a bus home. the only problem I have now is I dont remember where I put the keys to the bus.
As I get older my tastes are changing, for instance I used to not like brussels sprouts but now I don`t like people.
A mistress is something between a Mister and a mattress.
"Size DOES matter", I whisper to my double stuffed Oreos.
Sometimes the smartest thing you can do is play dumb.
Just changed my wireless network name in my apartment to "I can hear you having sex through the ceiling and it sounds mediocre."
It’s pretty scary that before facebook… All these thoughts and stuff just stayed in peoples heads.
How many people actually tell everyone that you said Hi.
My leadership experience is pretty much limited to those three consecutive days in first grade when I was line leader.