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If every U.S. sports team converted to metric, Americans would understand the metric system by the next game.
All I`m saying is one of us is right and the other one is you.
I`m thinkin` Dodgeball........... but with random people..........who don`t know they are playing.............
You are intriguing. You require further stalking, sorry I mean investigation.
You win some, you lose some, and if you`re lucky, you get some.
Mission Impossible: Ordering something at Subway without saying, "ummmm".
I have a million dollar idea that I will share with the first million people to send me a dollar.
Actually, I prefer to smile on the `inside`, then no one knows what you`re up to....
It’s funny how people get mad when you treat them the same way they treat you.
People who describe things as “better than sex” are having the wrong kind of sex.
Never take a Chess enthusiast to a restaurant with checkered tablecloths!……It’ll take them an hour to pass the salt!
I remember the days when I could refer to my knees as right and left. Now I refer to them as the good and bad knee.
I once dated a woman who thought windmills were solar powered. I`m so glad I don`t drink anymore.
The drunker I get, the more dance moves I know.
I just bought a house, car and a boat with no payments until 2013. Those f`ing Mayans better be right…