Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Insomnia is very common. Try not to lose any sleep over it.
My insurance company said if my tent is stolen while I`m camping, I won`t be covered.
I just let my mind wander, but it didn’t come back yet.
Mom: How are your grades this semester? Me:.... Mom:.... Me: Mother what`s important is that we have our health
If you think your wife has a great sense of humor, try leaving a trail of rose petals leading to a sink full of dirty dishes. Not the best idea a man ever had ;)
You know you’re working class when your TV is bigger than your book case.
Although no one can go back and make a brand new start, anyone can start from now and make a brand new ending.
Can anyone recommend a few thousand books on hoarding?
How do you spot a blind man at a nude beach? It`s not hard.
This is 2016. How come I can`t email someone a fart when I feel like it?
Sitting in traffic like the non-helicopter owning loser that I am.
Whoever determined that a 1-inch candy bar should be called " fun size" should really re-evaluate their stanards of entertainment.
My favorite exercise is somewhere between a lunge and a crunch. It`s called lunch.
I’m going back to sleep. I refuse to give up on my dreams that easily.
Lets all take a minute and realize the lack of creativity in the name "fire place"