Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Transformation Tuesday! Throwback Thursday! Flashback Friday! Never underestimate a woman`s ability to find a reason to post a selfie.
I hope I never have to run for my life. It wouldn’t end well.
Well, if you count Elmer Fudd singing "Kill the Wabbit" then yes, I do like opera.
dear journal..im now the coolest kid in school....mom:SWEETIE THE CHESSCLUB IS HERE 4 U!!!
Today is National Take Your Flask To Work Day. I just made it up. Tell the others.
"Open Mike Night" sounded like a lot of fun until I realised I`d been invited to an autopsy.
People assume I’m smart when they see my glasses case. Then they see that I use it to store a Snickers bar and they recognize my true genius.
I was told that exercise helps with your decision making. It’s true. After going to the gym earlier I’ve decided I’m never going again.
I think even hospital gowns cover more than my insurance does...
Teaching your dog to fetch a beer is smart. Fetching it from your neighbor`s house is genius.
I assume when I get put on hold after I call customer service, it`s because 2 guys are flipping a coin to see who pretends to be the manager.
Note to self: Thanks for always being there.
A girl who lives hundreds of miles away texting you “I’m drunk” is like a lasagna texting you from Italy saying “I’m delicious”
Don`t worry about walking a mile in my shows. Try a day thinking in head.
A quiet man, is a thinking man. A quiet woman, is usually mad.