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Honesty is the best policy, but insanity makes for a better legal defense.
Three decades of playing Tetris have apparently not improved our nation`s ability to stow overhead luggage.
Sometimes I think of something so wrong and inappropriate that my little black heart skips a beat with delight.
Funny how things change with time, I used to hate spankings...
Poetry would be a lot harder if violets were orange.
If you ever need nothing I am here for you.
I received an email from a hacker that had accessed my bank account. It simply read, "LOL".
Choosing A Career Is Like Chosing A Wife From 10 Girls. Even If You Pick The Most Beautiful, Intelligent, Kindest Woman, There`s Still Pain Of Losing The Other 9
I made a huge TO DO list for this weekend. I just can`t figure out who`s going to do it.
Dear YouTube, I will always “Skip this ad.”
Girl: I have changed my mind. Boy: Thank God! Does the new one work?
You bring the friendship, I`ll bring the benefits.
Guys communicate by insulting each other, but don’t really mean it. Girls communicate by complimenting each other, but don’t really mean it.
Welcome to my bedroom,this is where the magic happens.....and by that I mean this is where I read my Harry Potter books.
FACT: Men are much less likely to divulge a secret than women. Probably because they weren`t really listening to begin with.