Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
If you say married people aren’t having sex, you have obviously never sat in a hotel bar & watched them pick up strangers.
The best part about Valentine`s Day is that tomorrow is Friday.
My pet unicorn told me that I was being delusional again. :/
Velcro is a ripoff
People who say they sleep like a baby usually dont have one
I look so young for my rage.
If you really want someone to listen to you, start the conversation with "I shouldn`t be telling you this but ..."
I get very annoyed when people mix up there, they`re and their. From now on I`m going to point it out, weather they like it or not.
What if your soulmate is over there on Twitter while you`re here on Facebook?
What idiot called him Alexander Graham Bell instead of Lord of the Rings
The guy who wrote the program that estimates how much time is left on a download did not take his job seriously at all.
All I know about sex is from Internet Porn, I`ve tried everything except `Buffering`.
Obviously the movie "the good wife" is not based on a true story. It`s fiction people.
My wife accused me of spending too much time on Facebook. That’s funny, when did I get a wife?
If by a blow job you mean blowing everything out of proportion then yes I totally rock at blow jobs.