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I run entirely on caffeine and inappropriate thoughts.
Sometimes I feel bad about the things I say and do, but today is not one of those days.
"Give me your finest meal, money is of no concern." ~ Me at McDonald`s on pay day.
Someone asked me why I use the "F" bomb so much. What the F*ck is an "F" bomb?
When I`m on my death bed, I want my last words to be...."I left 10 million dollars in the..........."
But what if bygones want to be something else? ;)
Due to the weather, I was able to use the words "wet and slippery" at work all day without anyone thinking I`m a big perv.
Some people see a glass as half empty. Some see a glass as half full. Most need to get a life & do something besides stare at glasses.
Of course you have a right to your own opinion. Just like I have a right to tell you to shove it up your a$$.
A guy at work calls me "Partner" and another guy calls me "Chief". Apparently we`re playing Cowboys and Indians and I`m a double agent.
I wish I could select all my responsibilities and press delete.
Currently helping my son search for his chocolate that I ate last night.
Organized people are just too lazy to look for things.
Today I saw a girl with the word "Anel" on her butt. I was like, woah..it`s supposed to say "Anal"..it`s spelled wrong then I realized it was supposed to say "Angel". The G was stuck in her a$$crack
What does "it" mean in the sentence "What time is it?"?