Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
I have a feeling I already know which direction my "Get rich or die trying" lifestyle is headed.
You call the shots. I`ll drink them.
I love tan lines... it`s like God came down and high-lighted all the good parts... ;-)
OK. Who decided to call it "possession of marijuana" and not "joint custody"?
My phone battery lasts longer than relationships these days
You know that chick who said, "Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels?"... Yeah, well I ate her.
This bald spot just appeared out of thin hair.
Coffee, you`re on the bench ... Alcohol suit up!!
If there wasn’t such thing as a last minute I’d never get anything done.
Be thankful for Facebook, the way gas prices are headed we may never actually see each other again.
I can`t help but feel important when someone says there`s a special place in hell for people like me.
Admit it, we’ve all hidden our favorite food from the rest of our family.
Growing up we were so poor. If I wasn`t a boy I would have had nothing to play with.
My favorite exercise is somewhere between a lunge and a crunch. It`s called lunch.
i hate that the sun comes up so early