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Well today I turned 26, not because I wanted to, but only because Facebook limits how many times you can actually change your birth year !
Some people just need sympathetic pat.........on the head........with a hammer
The older I get the more I understand Squidward`s anger.
If everyone would stop screaming, I`m sure we`d all agree I`m not supposed to be in this women`s restroom.
The bills are washed, the dishes are paid, the laundryβs in the oven. Iβm going to bed.
For every action, thereβs an equal and opposite reaction. Plus a social media overreaction.
It`s amazing how important someone can make you feel with a smile, a kind word or the occasional stalking.
The hour that we lose this weekend is the one that I was planning on going to the gym.
is currently amending my "Who gets money" list when I win the lottery ... who has something nice to say?
Im afraid to go outside or even sit next to a window during an lightening storm. Im afraid that I`ll get zapped! I`m scared that God is gonna get me!!!
I never wanted to grow up, I just wanted to be tall enough to reach the cookies.
Its too damn early. Even the voices in my head are still snoring.
I did a push-up today. Well, actually I fell down, but had to use my arms to get back up, so close enough. Now I need a beer.
Because it`s the season to give thanks, I would just like to say....you`re welcome.
I always put a little umbrella in my drink so it doesn`t dilute in the shower.