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There`s a difference between having a unique name and a common name that`s spelled wrong.
A wireless bra? They weren`t tricky enough, now I need a password?
The phrase, “Don’t take this the wrong way” has a zero percent success rate.
Friends help you move. Real friends help you move bodies.
Why do the people with the most annoying voices always appear to have the worst case of verbal diarrheal??!!
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning.
Life..it`s just an `F` in lie....
A show called the view shouldn`t hurt your eyes
Don`t get me wrong, this Chinese take-out is amazing. But I`ll be damned if they expect me to believe a chicken fried this rice
If anyone lost a roll of hundred dollar bills, with a rubber band around it...... I found the rubber band.
Accidentally walking through the camping aisle at Target every once in a while is about as outdoorsy as I get.
Be nice to nerds. You`ll probably be working for them one day
Who called them expiration dates instead of spoiler alerts
It`s not karma, you`re just an idiot.
I`m a big advocate of the `You started it` method of defense in an argument.