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Some people are normal. What an awful, boring existence that must be.
I think I`m a grown up the same way Dr. Phil is a doctor.
Some days I’d like to take a chainsaw and cut a few branches off my family tree.
so, on a scale of one is to seven, which letter of the alphebet is your favourite colour?
Nothing screams "I don`t care about being on time for work" like hopping on Facebook first thing in the morning.
Of course I plan to seize the day ... Eventually.
Settle down joggers at red lights, settle down.
What do people mean "get ready for bed"? I am ALWAYS ready for bed.
We all have that one person we forever regret giving our phone number to.
The older I get, the more I sympathize with Squidward`s anger.
just bought 400 copies of Hoarders: Season 1. Not sure what to do with them.
When I get in an elevator, before I press a button I look at everyone inside and say “Are you ready to take this sh!t to a whole new level?”
It takes so much self control for me not to write, "you sure about that?" under Facebook engagement announcements.
Plan to be spontaneous - tomorrow.
Just got rid of 150lbs of ugly fat ... Got divorced.