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The awkward moment when you’re running and your boobs are bouncing …. and you’re a guy.
You`re the reason I wake up every morning... Just kidding, I have to goto work.
The naked truth is better, than d dressed-up lie :) Aa
I wish there was more BitStrips and photos of giraffes on my Facebook
I`d have a longer attention span if things weren`t so shiny.
In the spirit of spring cleaning and Easter, I`m keeping the dust bunnies as decorations.
Helping my kid study for her geology exam, and apparently `hard` `classic` and `punk` are not the 3 different types of rock.
It`s fun to chant "Bloody Mary" three times into your car`s side mirror while driving at night and watch her jog to keep up
You mellennials and your obsession with public healthcare, back in my day we just died!
There is a 3-for-2 sale in my local shoe shop. I almost bought myself a new pair of shoes, but couldn`t decide whether to get an extra left or a right one as part of the offer....
Shouting "Not it!" should still make us exempt from doing anything that we don`t feel like doing.
The exam hall is the only place on the earth where everyone is desperate for teamwork..
Common sense is like deodorant....The people who need it most never use it.
I made the mistake of asking Siri what women want....she has been talking non-stop for the last 3 days.
It’s hard to explain puns to kleptomaniacs… because they always take things literally