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What`s the right age to stop running naked from the bedroom to the bathroom?
I was just chatting with my cat about how being lonely can make a person crazy.
Give a man a gun he can rob a bank. Give a man a bank and he can rob everybody
Someone asked me today if ive ever been with two women at the same time. But why would I want to disappoint two women at the same time?
is wondering why Facebook bothers to give the option of "liking" my own comment? Of course I like my own comments. Iยดm awesome..
There is no greater stress than the stress of a guy who forgot his phone & left it at home with his wife.
You can`t Febreze bullshit.
was on the treadmill for over an hour and I must say it is much easier with roller blades
"You drive me to drink!!!" ~Me shouting to the taxi driver.
I hate to rub it in, but lotion doesn`t really work otherwise.
"It`s not about who`s right or wrong."~ The person that is wrong
Facebook reminds me of what my grandpa always used to say, `Who are you people and what are you all jabbering about anyway?`
The other night, I posted on Facebook I was going to sleep shirtless. The next day I logged on and saw 7 mosquitoes "like" this.
My dog is eating. I`m sitting next to her, staring intently at her, making her obviously uncomfortable. Yeah, how`s THAT feel, mutt?
Technically, every picture is a before picture.