Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Do you ever think that if it weren`t for someone smoking Marijuana they might of killed you already. . .
Breaking News: Tuesdays suck just as much as Mondays.
I don`t understand why people go to the gym all the time... everything there`s so heavy.
Math questions are so stupid! They’re like “If I have 5 bottles in one hand and 6 in the other, what do I have?” Oh I dunno, a drinking problem maybe?
I just saw a gang of really drunk mosquitoes leave my arm and high-five each other. Weird.
Girls here`s how to tell if a guy wants you for sex - 1: He does
If you really want to impress me with the year a bottle of wine was made, bring me one from 2024....
OH I´m sorry! I didn´t realise you were giving me a dirty look. I just thought you were ugly like that all the time!
People who peel the entire banana before eating it must be the same ones who take off all their clothes to go to the bathroom.
Deaf people don`t have safe words, they use stop signs.
I wish all videos of people twerking ended with them catching on fire.
Exercise can add years to your life. For example, I just ran 2 miles and I now feel like I`m 82.
I turned out ok for a kid raised in a large part by Bugs Bunny.
Birth control pills should really be made for men. It makes more sense to unload a gun than to shoot a bulletproof vest.
Life is like a burrito. If you fill it with too many things it falls apart and then you cry and they kick you out of Chipotle.