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The worlds gonna end in 5 days & I don`t know what I`m gonna wear.
They should make a medal for anyone who uses an entire tube of chapstick without losing it.
If you never set it, you always have the excuse, "I overslept because the alarm didn`t go off."
I never thought I’d be the type of person who would get up early in the morning to exercise. I was right.
Mom: How are your grades this semester? Me:.... Mom:.... Me: Mother what`s important is that we have our health
If you can’t afford to go on vacation, you can always drink until you don’t know where you are!
Next time you’re asked “What’s Up” respond “A delightful animated film about a young boy and an old man who fly away to an exotic place in a balloon house.”
I cannot be held responsible for what my face does when other people talk.
To save time, lets just assume I am never wrong ;)
I put the hot in psychotic.
Nice try salad bars, there`s only one kinda bar I plan on attending.
I wish electronics would scream a little bit when you unplugged them.
On cold mornings like this I just tell outrageous lies and hope my pants catch fire.
To be clever can be difficult without caffiene.
The only rule of the Chess Club is to hide from the Fight Club.