Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Who else has dropped the phone on their face while laying in bed reading Facebook?
You never know a person until you walk in their shoes, or until you check their browser history.
If I died and went straight to hell, it would take me a week to realize I wasn`t at work anymore.
According to the law it`s not appropriate to put a bounty on my boss. I actually thought it showed great initiative and leadership.
No PornHub, I would NOT like to share this video with my friends and family on Facebook.
The problem with the general public is that it`s made of people.
The worst thing about renting movie from a Red Box is that a $1 late fee isn’t enough motivation to get off the couch.
If you work Security in a Samsung store does that make you a Guardian of the Galaxy?
Somehow I`m not nearly as overjoyed with this vegetable slicer as the woman on the infomercial was.
You know you`re non-domesticated when the only reason you finally transfer the dishes from the sink to the dishwasher is so you can gain access to the garbage disposal.
Today my role will be played by an overworked, under caffeinated, sarcastic, unstable, asshole. Consider this my disclaimer for the day.
If you enter a room and there`s no food, you`re in the wrong room.
This relationship is going to be weird if you keep pretending I`m not your boyfriend.
Was up all night wondering, why do people compliment me for having all my sh!t together & yet still insult me for being full of it?
For the life of me, I can’t understand why small and medium pizzas exist.