Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Just slung my bra off & threw it to the other side of the couch where there are already 2 other bras. If my math is right, it`s Wednesday.
Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle
Guys, if my hair doesn`t look like a birds nest afterward, you`re doing it wrong.
I need professional help. A chef and a butler will do just fine.
OMG! I went shopping because I needed a skirt and these earings were on special so I bought four new pairs of shoes!
Defeat....the feeling you get when you realize the "next" level is just as hard......
As your best friend, I swear to always pretend to be your lesbian lover when you are getting hit on by an ulgy ass hole in a bar.
Sea levels aren’t rising due to global warming. They are rising due to the increase in obesity. The continents are actually sinking…
WHEW! I just had a near-work experience.
My bank lets me send a text message and it will text back with my balance. Its a cool feature but I didn`t think the LOL was necessary.
99 Days Facebook Free? Big deal! In 1999 I went a whole year without Facebook.
I can`t help but smile when I see a woman wearing a Supertramp Concert t-shirt
That annoying moment when a package says "easy open" and you need scissors, a knife, a gun, and a lightsaber just to open it.
Do you really have to breath that much?
So today my gym was crowded...at least I think it was a gym...Do gyms usually have drive thrus?