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I just called. To say. I texted you.
It`s pretty stupid the way mornings have to come every morning.
I wonder what "don`t touch" is in Braille.
Social media - keeping people away from each other since 2006.
I used to like my neighbours, until they put a password on their Wi-Fi
The only thing we have to fear, is fear itself"...and spiders. Oh, and ticks and nuclear war and getting laid off and losing your eye sight and...
Iām not so much goofing off as impersonating upper management.
The first guy who persuaded a blind guy to wear sunglasses, must have been a hell of a salesman.
I went to Jared for my girlfriend`s Christmas gift. I`m sure she will love her Subway gift card.
I don`t trust stairs. They always look like they`re up to something.
Why don`t you slip into something more comfortable, like a coma
Iām home alone. Time to start my concert.
Ladies, I hate to break this to you, but curves and rolls are not the same thing.
"Can`t touch this." ... "Can`t touch this." ... "Can`t touch this."--MC Hammer giving a Museum tour
Seeing how Iron Man and Batman are only really smart and super rich, Iām really disappointed with Bill Gates.