Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Roses are red, violets are blue. I have 5 fingers, the middle one is for you.
Don`t rush me, I`m waiting until the last minute.
Instead of exes, they should be called whys.
Appearing on several episodes of Cops doesn`t make you a TV star.
Every once in a while someone really special walks into your life. That person is usually delivering a pizza
How come no one in a zombie movie has ever seen a zombie movie
Donuts: An excuse to eat cake for breakfast.
If money can’t buy happiness explain pizza.
So far the "couch" part of couch-to-5k is easily my favorite.
What an intoxicated Schwarzenegger might say to a police officer: "I`m an IDIOT you COP!"
It seems racist that they call it Black Friday just because a bunch of people are trying to get into stores in the middle of the night.
The problem with some people is that they’re alive.
I bought a little bag of air today, and the company that made it were kind enough to put some potato chips in it.
Friday. The golden child of the weekdays. The superhero of the workweek. The welcome wagon to the weekend. The famous F word we thank God for every week.
Kid`s Choice Awards are a great reminder why children aren`t allowed to vote.