Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Tonight`s good mood is sponsored by ... Beer!!
Somedays I feel like running away. Then I remember how much I hate running.
If one of your life goals is to fight with someone about how to load a dishwasher, may I suggest marriage.
If you`re going to walk a mile in my shoes...Can you pick me up some beer on your way back?
Blue&Black or White&Gold? Who cares what color the dress is, so long as its balled up on the floor of my bedroom.
I`m having a problem in Call Of Duty, I go to the menu and... ok by now the girls have stopped reading this, anyone know any good porn sites?
I love finding money in my clothes. It’s like a gift to me ... from me.
Now that I know how many calories there are in a pint of beer , I have decided to stop eating.
If you`re going to be original, be prepared to be copied.
Then there was the ex-cop who started his own landscaping business. He called it Lawn Order.
Sometimes, I`m offended at how easily offended some people get.
We didn`t take a video recording of our child`s birth but we have some awesome video of his conception.
Turns out a crash diet doesn`t mean having vodka with every meal and falling down the stairs!
My girlfriend wanted me to come shopping, but I had a headache... I must have caught it from her last night when we didn`t have sex.
Million dollar idea: A snooze button that lets you sleep longer the harder you hit it.