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i just accidentally used AOL online, im betting the workers there are celebrating and think they have a chance in the future. lol
Sure, Men love funny women. As long as they are pretty...and skinny...and they have a great pair of knockers!!
My neighbors listen to some excellent music. Whether they like it or not.
Maybe Oscar wouldn`t have been so grouchy if the people on Sesame Street cared about the fact that he`s homeless
It`s hard to trust humans; even the blind prefer to be guided by dogs.
Friendship is like peeing on yourself; everyone can see it but only you can feel the warmth that it brings.
New word of the day: Stupidiot!!
I never said I was better than everyone else, just better than you.
Meant to tell my kid "Good night, I love you," but it came out as "Thank god you go back to school tomorrow because this is bullsh!t"
You know your old when your back goes out more than you do.
I think my problem is that I have really fantastic bad ideas...
Today was about as much fun as a warm toilet seat in a public restroom!
Never run after a man or a bus, there is always another one coming.
Things that don`t kill bees: 1. Furniture polish 2. Febreeze 3. Butter 4. Screaming
If my grandmother were alive today, I`m pretty sure she`d still have her blinker on.