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I would like to think that I`ll die heroic death saving someone`s life but it`s more likely I`ll trip over my shoelaces and choke on a spoonful of Nutella.
wonders how you can knock sense into someone when you`re beating them senseless?
Sadly, the opposite sex is ignoring me like a check engine light.
I put a pair of boots in the bathroom stall at work so nobody else will use the stall that I like to use.
When I go running, I usually meet new people..... like paramedics.
I wonder if the clouds ever look down on us and say "Hey look! ...that one`s shaped like an idiot!"?
Someone said to me earlier, "Your face looks very familiar". I said, "I know, I`ve had it a long time."
I`m just a man standing in front of a woman, who is standing in front of another man who is in front of another woman in line at Taco Bell.
If you work on a farm and your job is to take care of chickens, you are a chicken tender.
I`m sorry if I come across as crude, outspoken, and opinionated. That`s only because I am crude, outspoken, and opinionated.
Today`s Big Idea: Coffee eye drops.
Sometimes you`ve got to ask yourself: "Why am I talking to myself?"
I am Looking for a Bank which can offer me these Two Services..... .Give me a Loan & then Leave me aLone. :)
is experiencing life at a rate of several wtf´s a minute
I`m not naughty ... I`m mischievously creative