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I may have just inadvertently accomplished something.
Girls are too sensitive. She said she was having twins and I said, "At least you`ll finally have 2 kids by the same father."
White girls be like: I`ll have one triple mocha dark chocolate ugg boot raspberry white iphone 5 double caramel infinity sign frappe please.
If you see someone wearing camouflage clothing, bump into them. It only takes a second of your time & it makes them feel like it works.
People liking my status from a week ago on Facebook proves that I have stalkers.
Does anyone else have a plastic bag full of plastic bags in their house, or is it just me?
I get a little nervous before saying Worcestershire sauce.
Thought of the day! Calling me a crazy bitch will only encourage me to prove you right...
If you’re happy and you know it, you’re probably exhausting to be around.
Heard Justin Bieber got arrested for drag racing. Sure it`s dangerous, but surely it isn`t against the law to run in high heels...
If you died and went to he!l, how long will it take you to realise that you aren`t still at work?
There are two types of people...don`t worry you are not one of them.
It`s so strange to think that before Facebook all of this nonsense just stayed in people`s heads.
Teacher: Have a seat! Student: Thanks! *picks up the chair and leaves* -- (°_°)
Idiots are fun, no wonder every village has one.