Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
I can not be held responsible for what my face does when you talk.
My doctor said I needed to reduce stress. Great, now I have that to worry about.
What if there were no hypothetical questions?
It`s funny to watch all these people Bumping Up their own posts.
Women come in two types: batsiht crazy and hot enough to ignore the batsiht crazy…
If I could have anything in the world it would be to have the same finger prints as my enemy
Someday, I`ll live in my OWN basement!
If you want to see exactly how angry a person can get, tell them to "calm down" when they`re already pissed off.
Hate cleaning my floors...how fast would I go to hell if I got a blind roommate and replaced his cane with a swiffer?
DIET TIP: don’t eat chips right out of the bag. Get out just enough to eat until the pizza guy gets there.
It`s never your successful friends posting inspirational quotes on Facebook.
Facebook should have a limit on times you can update your relationship status, after 3 it should default to "unstable".
Sometimes I laugh so hard the tears run down my leg ;)
Have you ever listened to somebody speak and wonder who ties their shoelaces for them?
Driving a Dodge doesn`t automatically make you a defensive driver.