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Just drank a `coffee to go` while sitting. Screw the system!
How to get a woman mad in 2 easy steps: 1. Take a picture of her. 2. Don`t show it to her.
I hate when a couple argues in public but I missed the start and don`t know whose side I`m on.
I`m on a pepperoni pizza cleanse.
The fox says you need to stop.
Is there another word for synonym?
My life is about as organized as the $5 DVD bin at Wal-mart.
I bet Snowmen think it`s weird that the ground is completely covered in their skin.
Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.
The trouble with living alone is that it`s always my turn to do dishes.
Instead of going to Starbucks, I make my own coffee, yell my name out incorrectly, and then light a $5 bill on fire.
If everyone would just be naughty next year, Santa would bring us all coal ... energy crisis solved!
PARENTS: your teen may be worshipping Satan. Look for these terms: LOL - Lucifer Our Lord, BRB - Burn Religious Books, TBH - Tell Beelzebub Hi
Several years ago Facebook came in to our lives forever changing our ability to judge each other from our couches.
I’m not saying my golf game went bad, but if I grew tomatoes, they’d come up sliced.