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Helpful Tip: A ceiling fan won`t cut a bagel in half ... Not even on top speed
Based on the sound of her walking.. My upstairs neighbor seems like the kind of woman that starts sentences with; "Fee-Fi-Fo-Fum.".. O_o
I like to dump Skittles in the toilet and then flush it because it looks like a little tiny NASCAR race.
The black sheep always have the best stories.
I saw a poor old lady fall over today, at least I presume she was poor, she only had $ 1,20 in her purse
Are the ATF and border patrols also shutdown? Asking for a Mexican friend....
Drinking coffee in the afternoon is like eating the mushroom that makes you big in Super Mario.
Sรถ รฎ hรจรฃrd รฟรดu lรฌkรช gรนรฟลก with รกcรงeรฑts?
If you`re able to roll over in your grave, you should save that energy for yelling and digging.
I`m that friend that you have to explain to people before you introduce me and apologize about afterwards.
Sorry, just got your text. Are we still on for last night?
I need chapstick on my lips ... anyone want to share ?
Iโm not saying Iโm psychic, but Iโm positive I will have no interest in what youโre about to say.
I have nothing!
going to mcdonalds for a salad is like going to a brothel for a hug